For all my dear friends:

This last year has been a trying year, but an overall good year.  Heart ache, grief, fear, happiness, healing, and new adventures.  Back in November of 2001 I started working for a telecom company, and in March 2002 I was hired on as a full time software engineer.  That was both scary and exciting.  I am still with them and they are great to work for.

Five very scary events happened this year: one made me remind myself of who I really am and the others that I needed to tell my parents how much I love them. 

The first event was the divorce.  I learned that I don't have to live under a cloud of fear all the time.  I've learned that I still have a sense of humor about life.  I'm strong enough to walk away from everything I worked at for eight years, walk away with only my clothes and items that were gifts to me.  I'm starting over with nothing and I'm having a great time at it. 

But, I can't say it was painless.  I cried the day I signed my papers.  I cried the day of the divorce.  I still cry occasionally over stupid things, but the trade off has been worth it.  Each month that goes by, I'm more comfortable with who I am now than I ever was in the eight years I was married to him.  That is not a celebration of divorce, but it is a comment on our marriage.  I did love him at some point and I still care deeply about his well being.  I hope he gets his heart's desire out of life.

The second scary event was that my Dad landed in the ER with symptoms of a heart attack.  That speaks for itself.  Everyone knows I love my parents.  I sometimes say they are crazy or this or that...but I ALWAYS say they are good people.  They gave me the best of everything that is important in life.  Laughter, love, discipline, frustration, embarrassment ;) and all the other things that help shape who an individual is.

The third...Dad again...this time it was his sixth back surgery and an emergency one at that.  Could have had permanent damage if he didn't have the surgery...coulda been paralyzed while in surgery.  ugh!  All turned out very well.  He's doing great in comparison to last year.

And then...it was Mom.  Severe abdominal pain that sent her to the hospital emergency room.  Diagnosis: two kidney stones, one in each kidney.  She had lithotripsy and is doing very well at the moment also.

Now, it's Dad again.  In for his seventh back surgery.  We are hoping this is it.  Crazy year!